Sunday, 18 September 2011

Being single again

Well, I'm back in the world of being single again. I have just come out of one of the most normal relationships I have ever been in. He was kind, and funny and lovely and sensible. At a time when my life was spiralling into crazydom, he came along and pulled me to to a world that other people seem to always have.

He is definitely what I needed to help me bring back my faith in humankind. I enjoyed the simple things we did and even if once in a while, I went back to my loud self, he didn't even flinch. So I began to think that maybe there could be a future with him.

But as I said, he is sensible. Far more sensible than me. He does not live in cuckoo land like I do half the time. Staying together was not realistic. Too many sensible reasons to go into but needless to say that I am very sad about it.

I wish we were able to work things through and live happily ever after. But it was not meant to be and I can leave this relationship not having any bitter feelings for him. Because we ended it before it got too messy and before we ended up resenting each other.

I am so glad I met someone like him and I am grateful for the time we spent together. We did the usual 'lets stay friends', I wish we can but.... maybe not now.

I have always felt detached from the real world and with him, I felt like I was part of it for that short while. He probably doesn't know how much he means to me at a whole different level. There is no point in telling him. He'll forget me in a couple of months as people do in the real world, and I will be so jealous of the girl he eventually settles down with.

I just hope my girlfriends pull through for me during this time. I don't want to go back on the dating scene, as I don't think I will find anyone as kind as him. Also, trying to meet someone is so exhausting. I don't know how anyone else does it. Even one of my mates who has been virtually a hermit for the best part of four years found a man who wants to be in a serious relationship with her the moment she went out of the house!

This post is dedicated to those of you who are single, or those who have ever had to let go of the best thing that ever happened to you. And this post is also dedicated to the boy who will never read this.


  1. Try not to be too sad. Things are raw right now, and I expect you'll feel like this for a while. But like you said, that girl that who had a future planned out as a hermit found someone, so don't give up! Love could be closer than you think. Carry on feeling positive thoughts about this chap, don't let bitterness take you over. Thinking of you OK? xxx

  2. Thank you for your lovely message, nearly bought a tear to my eye whilst reading it on the train! Really appreciate the good vibes. You are right, stay positive about the memories. I'll give myself this week to wallow in self pity and hopefully start afresh :) xx